According to BBC News at least 189 have been killed in the past week in the Democratic Republic of Congo. Mostly women and children chopped to death by machetes while in church by the Ugandan LRA. A witness hid in a bush outside one church while the wailing victims cried out.
Joseph Kony, leader for the LRA, says that the reports of attacks are propaganda.
Whatever the case, peace is not in this region of the world. Please pray for change, pray for peace, pray for Joseph Kony to turn himself into the UN and sign a peace treaty!
Monday, December 29, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Ramblings of an incomplete idiot: Prologue
A book of confession for my own piety weaknesses that frustrate me and I pray will one day change:
There are some annoying people in this world. People that purposefully get on your nervous, people whom are oblivious to their own stigma.....people who are great, but have those little habits that make you want to tear your eyeballs out of their sockets with a spoon just to focus your attention on something, anything else. But what I find most annoying and unbearable if I allow myself to think about it is the fact that what I find annoying in other people, is actually what I hate about myself.
A hypocrite of hypocrites, solely focused on the shortcomings of others in an attempt to hide from the mirror of self-realization. However, even after brief moments of clarity of epiphany, of confession, I eventually resort back to the behaviors I despise. Why? Because consciously or unconsciously, I make the decision that it is too much effort to change. All the complaining, all the whining, all the hot-air being blown into oblivion is in vain. A charade to fool myself more then others. The illusion of desire to change, without a hint of sincerity.
What is my problem? In one word: laziness! You can say I am a product of my environment, a victim to my culture that promises instant gratification, but I believe the blame lies a bit closer to home then even I want to admit. When I try to put the blame outside of myself I feel the sting of denial in the pit of my stomach. Sure, it would be easy to blame my lack of aptitude to grow on an external source, but I know that is a lie. There comes a point where we each have to take responsibility for the decisions we make…or lack there of to be more specific. To quote one of my favorite pastors, Mark Driscoll says there are sins of commission and sins of omission. Meaning there are decisions we make, conscious or not, to act in a particular manner contrary to what is right: a sin of commission. Then there are things that we ought to do, but we opt out of doing the right thing: a sin of omission.
These here are the ramblings of my incomplete mind…me the idiot. This is an attempt to use my passion for writing to express the things I don’t want to talk about, don’t want to deal with, and don’t want to change…but need to! So please indulge me in this venture…read…comment…share….reflect….and be honest with yourself…after all, that is the point I am trying to get to. I’m write in light of my personal conviction the Jesus Christ died for my sins, was buried, and rose again (conquering death). Not everyone who reads this will agree with that, but I ask you to please keep an open mind and don’t write me off. Thanks
This is the prologue to my first installment….
There are some annoying people in this world. People that purposefully get on your nervous, people whom are oblivious to their own stigma.....people who are great, but have those little habits that make you want to tear your eyeballs out of their sockets with a spoon just to focus your attention on something, anything else. But what I find most annoying and unbearable if I allow myself to think about it is the fact that what I find annoying in other people, is actually what I hate about myself.
A hypocrite of hypocrites, solely focused on the shortcomings of others in an attempt to hide from the mirror of self-realization. However, even after brief moments of clarity of epiphany, of confession, I eventually resort back to the behaviors I despise. Why? Because consciously or unconsciously, I make the decision that it is too much effort to change. All the complaining, all the whining, all the hot-air being blown into oblivion is in vain. A charade to fool myself more then others. The illusion of desire to change, without a hint of sincerity.
What is my problem? In one word: laziness! You can say I am a product of my environment, a victim to my culture that promises instant gratification, but I believe the blame lies a bit closer to home then even I want to admit. When I try to put the blame outside of myself I feel the sting of denial in the pit of my stomach. Sure, it would be easy to blame my lack of aptitude to grow on an external source, but I know that is a lie. There comes a point where we each have to take responsibility for the decisions we make…or lack there of to be more specific. To quote one of my favorite pastors, Mark Driscoll says there are sins of commission and sins of omission. Meaning there are decisions we make, conscious or not, to act in a particular manner contrary to what is right: a sin of commission. Then there are things that we ought to do, but we opt out of doing the right thing: a sin of omission.
These here are the ramblings of my incomplete mind…me the idiot. This is an attempt to use my passion for writing to express the things I don’t want to talk about, don’t want to deal with, and don’t want to change…but need to! So please indulge me in this venture…read…comment…share….reflect….and be honest with yourself…after all, that is the point I am trying to get to. I’m write in light of my personal conviction the Jesus Christ died for my sins, was buried, and rose again (conquering death). Not everyone who reads this will agree with that, but I ask you to please keep an open mind and don’t write me off. Thanks
This is the prologue to my first installment….
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Ramblings of an incomplete idiot: issue 1
Curious. Staring straight ahead, eyes focused on the encompassing black, the crystals assaulting my face with each gust of wind looked like flashes of white missiles streaming to earth with unfaltering speed. Too many to count, too many to mean anything but harm. Yet…if I shifted my gaze towards the light, eyes wide, absorbing the crisp wet cold, it was another scene entirely. Soft pedals fluttered down, resting on my eyelashes only to be blinked away as my heat melted each distinct, unique marvel that graced my presence. Question…should I protect myself from attack or embrace the wonder? A soft but firm cylinder struck both shoulder blades in a single swipe. Thrust into the white abyss, air pushed forcefully from my lungs…Definitely an attack! Fierce cold scalded the contours of my face. Begrudgingly, I pulled my hands underneath my sunken form scraping the surface of powder as they went. My momentarily weak arms pushed my torso from the frozen tundra beneath. My back shielded me from my assailant. A smirk of vengeance burned from cheek to cheek. I cupped my hands once, turned, and slung a missile of my own. It might have been an attack, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t wonderful!
Monday, November 24, 2008
Turkey Day and Thanks:-)
Though I am not too bothered by the food....I have to say that Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. It doesn't matter what religion you are, what heritage you bring to the table, whether you are a first generation American from India or 10th generation from England....Thanksgiving is a holiday celebrated by EVERYONE!
With a cornucopia of different dishes cooked with family tradition and regional specialties, tables across America might look different on the last Thursday of November but the heart is the same. What are you thankful for?
The first Thanksgiving came about when the English settlers and the Native Americans got together to celebrate the harvest and thank God for their survival after a hard winter and to prepare for a new one. It was the Native Americans that taught the settlers how to plant for a fruitful harvest and this meal of thanksgiving crossed cultural barriers to give thanks.
The historical foundation might be hazy in the minds of many, but again, the heart is steadfast! What are you thankful for? In this consumer-driven, cotton candy nation focused on self-indulgence and engulfed in introspective philosophies here is a holiday that breaks out of the norm. With sincerity of heart, people come together with family, community, neighbors, and friends to stop and give thanks for the many blessings in their life.
I have many things to be thankful for....it is my prayer that my heart would ALWAYS be full of thanks and not just on this designated holiday....however, even if people only stop to give thanks once a year I am thankful for this day of thanks!
So here is my question to you....what are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?
With a cornucopia of different dishes cooked with family tradition and regional specialties, tables across America might look different on the last Thursday of November but the heart is the same. What are you thankful for?
The first Thanksgiving came about when the English settlers and the Native Americans got together to celebrate the harvest and thank God for their survival after a hard winter and to prepare for a new one. It was the Native Americans that taught the settlers how to plant for a fruitful harvest and this meal of thanksgiving crossed cultural barriers to give thanks.
The historical foundation might be hazy in the minds of many, but again, the heart is steadfast! What are you thankful for? In this consumer-driven, cotton candy nation focused on self-indulgence and engulfed in introspective philosophies here is a holiday that breaks out of the norm. With sincerity of heart, people come together with family, community, neighbors, and friends to stop and give thanks for the many blessings in their life.
I have many things to be thankful for....it is my prayer that my heart would ALWAYS be full of thanks and not just on this designated holiday....however, even if people only stop to give thanks once a year I am thankful for this day of thanks!
So here is my question to you....what are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Chhhhanges:-)
Do you ever look at the doubt in your life and wonder why you act like a stupid Israelites? I know I have said this before, but I will say it again....if you ever read through Judges it is like the idiot parade! The mess up, turn from God, suffer, then ask God for help....God saves them because He is their God and they are His people....then some time goes by and they mess up, turn from God, suffer, and call out to God for help....and so on and so on....well here is how I act like an Israelite....I know God id good, i know He is sovereign, and I know He provides....i ask for more faith in these areas, then when i am tested in them I complain and cry and act as if God isn't capable of fulfilling the promises He has set before me.....However, luckily, like the Israelites, God has grace on my life. I have a covenant with Him where He is my God and I am one of His people....and he does provide...i just pray that I down stop acting like an Israelite and stand firm on the promises of God.
How has He provided lately? Well, I am currently writing this blog entry from my new job at Northwestern Law School! That is right, no more restaurant! I have a "grownup" job as I like to call it:-) And everything about the job is an answer to prayer....it is in the pay range I was looking for, it is temp to hire, I will be able to take grad classes with tuition reimbursements, the people are great, the office is relaxed, it gives me time to work on my writing, and the job has variety and isn't boring.....so it took me six weeks to find a job. In the grand scheme of things that really isn't that much time. Yet I screamed and cried and complained like a stupid Israelite!
But that is the past...now I have a choice. I choose to be thankful and recognize that everything I have comes from God and that this job is part of His provision. I put my trust in Him and Him alone. That is where I put my faith.
PS:...speaking of Change....rock the vote....it's election day!!!!!
How has He provided lately? Well, I am currently writing this blog entry from my new job at Northwestern Law School! That is right, no more restaurant! I have a "grownup" job as I like to call it:-) And everything about the job is an answer to prayer....it is in the pay range I was looking for, it is temp to hire, I will be able to take grad classes with tuition reimbursements, the people are great, the office is relaxed, it gives me time to work on my writing, and the job has variety and isn't boring.....so it took me six weeks to find a job. In the grand scheme of things that really isn't that much time. Yet I screamed and cried and complained like a stupid Israelite!
But that is the past...now I have a choice. I choose to be thankful and recognize that everything I have comes from God and that this job is part of His provision. I put my trust in Him and Him alone. That is where I put my faith.
PS:...speaking of Change....rock the vote....it's election day!!!!!
Monday, October 13, 2008
Hit upside the head by the Holy Spirit!
So let me just prefix this by saying that I LOVE maps! No seriously, I love maps. I could look at a map for hours just to memorize where different countries are located. I like to know how far places are from one another, what the capital cities are, where one country is located in reference to another, what countries are found on the South Pacific....you get the idea.
I also love practical maps. In London there is this thing called the A to Z, and EVERY Londoner has an A to Z, (which is a 200 page breakdown of every street in all 33 boroughs of London with an alphabetical list in the back including all tube stations, hospitals, police stations, museums, and all major attractions). For someone who loves maps the A to Z is like a piece of heaven that fits nicely in your hand bag!....No matter where you were in London, if you felt lost for a moment, you could just reach into your pocket and pull out your A to Z and know exactly where you are! I loved it.
No one aspect of Chicago that I have found exceedingly frustrating is its complete lack of maps or helpful points of orientation! Complete void of anything helpful when trying to figure out where you are going.....this past weekend I went to a wedding in Olive Park which is right north of Navy Pier....I got of the El at Grand on the Red Line and knew that I only had to walk a few blocks...but the question is, "In what direction?" So I looked for a map and of course did not find one, so I asked the first person I saw...they were helpful, but actually pointed me in the completely wrong direction and after 15 minutes of walking in the wrong direction, realized that it was wrong and turned around again....in the end I got to where I needed to go by God's grace, but not without forming a monstrous headache of frustration. To top things off I had to run straight to work directly after the ceremony, so after finally finding where I needed to be I had to run back...hopefully in the right direction so that I could get to work on time.
In my state of angst against this intimidating city I walked as quickly as possible back towards the El all the while asking God what I was doing. My internal conversation went something like this, "God, what the heck? I know you are good, I know you are sovereign, I know you are a God of provision, but what am I even doing in in this city? I can't even find a map to figure out where I am in Chicago?"
That is when the Holy Spirit hit me upside the head! I have been so frustrated in my move to this new city because I haven't been able to find my place in Chicago. I felt like God was saying, "If you want to be orientated in this city, you need to first be orientated with me! If you know where you are in relation to the Son, you will find your place on the map." At the moment I walked past a huge building the the sun hit my face with such might that I had to shield my eyes. I laughed and realized that as frustrated as I have been, and as lost as I have felt, I do know in my heart that God is good, sovereign, and a provider. And if I get myself orientated with Him, I might just find my niche in this city after all.
And it is on that note of hope that I end this ramble:-)
I also love practical maps. In London there is this thing called the A to Z, and EVERY Londoner has an A to Z, (which is a 200 page breakdown of every street in all 33 boroughs of London with an alphabetical list in the back including all tube stations, hospitals, police stations, museums, and all major attractions). For someone who loves maps the A to Z is like a piece of heaven that fits nicely in your hand bag!....No matter where you were in London, if you felt lost for a moment, you could just reach into your pocket and pull out your A to Z and know exactly where you are! I loved it.
No one aspect of Chicago that I have found exceedingly frustrating is its complete lack of maps or helpful points of orientation! Complete void of anything helpful when trying to figure out where you are going.....this past weekend I went to a wedding in Olive Park which is right north of Navy Pier....I got of the El at Grand on the Red Line and knew that I only had to walk a few blocks...but the question is, "In what direction?" So I looked for a map and of course did not find one, so I asked the first person I saw...they were helpful, but actually pointed me in the completely wrong direction and after 15 minutes of walking in the wrong direction, realized that it was wrong and turned around again....in the end I got to where I needed to go by God's grace, but not without forming a monstrous headache of frustration. To top things off I had to run straight to work directly after the ceremony, so after finally finding where I needed to be I had to run back...hopefully in the right direction so that I could get to work on time.
In my state of angst against this intimidating city I walked as quickly as possible back towards the El all the while asking God what I was doing. My internal conversation went something like this, "God, what the heck? I know you are good, I know you are sovereign, I know you are a God of provision, but what am I even doing in in this city? I can't even find a map to figure out where I am in Chicago?"
That is when the Holy Spirit hit me upside the head! I have been so frustrated in my move to this new city because I haven't been able to find my place in Chicago. I felt like God was saying, "If you want to be orientated in this city, you need to first be orientated with me! If you know where you are in relation to the Son, you will find your place on the map." At the moment I walked past a huge building the the sun hit my face with such might that I had to shield my eyes. I laughed and realized that as frustrated as I have been, and as lost as I have felt, I do know in my heart that God is good, sovereign, and a provider. And if I get myself orientated with Him, I might just find my niche in this city after all.
And it is on that note of hope that I end this ramble:-)
Friday, October 3, 2008
hmmmm...thinking about anything but Chicago?
So here is the thing.....I love the idea of Chicago. I loved visiting Chicago when I was in uni....I love the people here....I love the Cubs and the fact that they are doing well....I love the history of the city....I love the feel of walking through the neighborhoods and getting the community vibe in the middle of a huge city....and of course I love the lake.....but how do I feel about moving to Chicago, I still don't know.
I know that my identity isn't found in what I do....I am not defined by whether or not I am a college student, whether or not I have a job, or whether or not I have the hopeful outlook on my bank statement...I am found in Christ....yet there seems to be a disconnect between my head and my heart when it comes to this fact.
Being in a new city, without a church, without a job, without family....and suddenly I lose focus of Jesus. I get frustrated at the fact that last year at this time I said goodbye to London and now a year later I am still not settled. I still looking, still seeking, still striving to hear God's still small voice. Doing my best to put Him first and seek to glorify Him and find the purpose He has for me. But then I stumble and fall on my face again. But He is faithful to pick me up, I just wish I wasn't a stupid Israelite that the Lord blesses then I turn my back, turn my heart and forget His goodness.
ANd that is where I'm at...trying to remember His goodness, HIs provision, and His faithfulness to bless those who love HIm and keep His commandments. If I abide in Him and His word in me then He will give me the desires of my heart...because at that point my desires will be His desires...but how do I get there? What does that look like? I guess that is what this journey is all about figuring out....so I will go do that.
I know that my identity isn't found in what I do....I am not defined by whether or not I am a college student, whether or not I have a job, or whether or not I have the hopeful outlook on my bank statement...I am found in Christ....yet there seems to be a disconnect between my head and my heart when it comes to this fact.
Being in a new city, without a church, without a job, without family....and suddenly I lose focus of Jesus. I get frustrated at the fact that last year at this time I said goodbye to London and now a year later I am still not settled. I still looking, still seeking, still striving to hear God's still small voice. Doing my best to put Him first and seek to glorify Him and find the purpose He has for me. But then I stumble and fall on my face again. But He is faithful to pick me up, I just wish I wasn't a stupid Israelite that the Lord blesses then I turn my back, turn my heart and forget His goodness.
ANd that is where I'm at...trying to remember His goodness, HIs provision, and His faithfulness to bless those who love HIm and keep His commandments. If I abide in Him and His word in me then He will give me the desires of my heart...because at that point my desires will be His desires...but how do I get there? What does that look like? I guess that is what this journey is all about figuring out....so I will go do that.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Power of Water
Do you ever stop and think of the complexity of water. Maybe not the chemical breakdown, but the sure duality as a life force and destructive menus. On my first weekend in Chicago I say first-hand the sheer madness of water.
After being in the car for fifteen hours the day before, I took it upon myself to make my way to the lake shore. There is no better way to explore a city then to shove on your sneakers and get lost in the hustle and bustle while figuring out your own way. (Luckily Chicago is a grid system, so I actually don't get lost all that often!) Out of breath I reached the lake, my burning legs stumbled to the rock wall, and I collapsed on the cool granite. Before me the majestic beauty of a seemingly endless body of water calmed my anxious heart as I sat back and reflected on my relocation to Chicago. The gray sky kissed the deep blue abyss that could have gone on to eternity....or to Wisconsin:-) It was this sight that started my reflection on the power of water. By far my favorite aspect of Chicago to date is Lake Michigan. Sitting before the shimmering liquid, abandon to any worldly concern, I search for God. Asking the hard questions in the peace of the stillness that lies before me, I find grace, answers, and mercy. Laughing at how something as simple as a lake could make me feel the power of the creator of the universe close at hand. As hours rolled on like moments, I finally picked myself up and made the trek back into to the city. Relaxed and full of joy at the prospect of the future. Thankful for the simple beauty of water.
However, that night water turned on the city. It started as a light rain, but as Friday turned into Saturday and Saturday turned into Sunday, the entire region of Albany Park registered the most rain in 137 years. The river had overflowed onto the streets, three buildings on North Park Campus were evacuated, local residents forced out of their homes, power outages left and right, and mass chaos erupting on every corner. Water...simple H2O... coming from the sky had pulled the city to a halt. Again, laughter came forth as I reflected on the complexity of the effects of water.
More then a week has now past and the flooding has subsided, the neighborhood is practically back to normal and the craziness of the flood a distant memory. But water, water remains. What is it about water that makes my heart seek the goodness of God? Perhaps it is the nature of water.....it can smooth the roughest stone, cut through the deepest rock, it is necessary for the preservation of humankind, it quenches the greatest thirst, and the simple beauty of a larger body of water brings hope to the hopeless.
Who knows? All I know is I love the Lake and am thankful for each drop of water that comes my way.
After being in the car for fifteen hours the day before, I took it upon myself to make my way to the lake shore. There is no better way to explore a city then to shove on your sneakers and get lost in the hustle and bustle while figuring out your own way. (Luckily Chicago is a grid system, so I actually don't get lost all that often!) Out of breath I reached the lake, my burning legs stumbled to the rock wall, and I collapsed on the cool granite. Before me the majestic beauty of a seemingly endless body of water calmed my anxious heart as I sat back and reflected on my relocation to Chicago. The gray sky kissed the deep blue abyss that could have gone on to eternity....or to Wisconsin:-) It was this sight that started my reflection on the power of water. By far my favorite aspect of Chicago to date is Lake Michigan. Sitting before the shimmering liquid, abandon to any worldly concern, I search for God. Asking the hard questions in the peace of the stillness that lies before me, I find grace, answers, and mercy. Laughing at how something as simple as a lake could make me feel the power of the creator of the universe close at hand. As hours rolled on like moments, I finally picked myself up and made the trek back into to the city. Relaxed and full of joy at the prospect of the future. Thankful for the simple beauty of water.
However, that night water turned on the city. It started as a light rain, but as Friday turned into Saturday and Saturday turned into Sunday, the entire region of Albany Park registered the most rain in 137 years. The river had overflowed onto the streets, three buildings on North Park Campus were evacuated, local residents forced out of their homes, power outages left and right, and mass chaos erupting on every corner. Water...simple H2O... coming from the sky had pulled the city to a halt. Again, laughter came forth as I reflected on the complexity of the effects of water.
More then a week has now past and the flooding has subsided, the neighborhood is practically back to normal and the craziness of the flood a distant memory. But water, water remains. What is it about water that makes my heart seek the goodness of God? Perhaps it is the nature of water.....it can smooth the roughest stone, cut through the deepest rock, it is necessary for the preservation of humankind, it quenches the greatest thirst, and the simple beauty of a larger body of water brings hope to the hopeless.
Who knows? All I know is I love the Lake and am thankful for each drop of water that comes my way.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Chicago!
Thirteen and a half hours after setting off from the great state of Connecticut, Alisha and I arrived in the Windy City. The trip was great...I loved driving cross-country...did you know that the speed limit in Indiana is 70mph? I freakin' love Indiana! That was just one of the many highlights. There are pictures to come but my computer is being weird so those will have to come in a later blog.
Even though there was a bit of loopiness due to lack of sleep I thought it would be a good idea to go to the House of Blues on that first night. It was fun...I did fall asleep...and the El...and practically slept walked home...but hey, go big or go home, right?
As for Chicago...I'm not going to lie, it still all feels like a dream. Here I am taking this leap of faith, but it feels more like a random road trip then a move. Although, I signed my lease today so that is pretty permanent...I guess it will take a while before it feels like home...probs after I get a job!
I am excited to dive into the multicultural neighborhood, explore the city, and enjoy the Lake. While I might be freaking out a little, I also rest assured on the fact that I don't need to have it all together. So until next time...
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Packing up the car
There comes a time when the crap needs to get in the car.
The idea of moving, the concept of change, the dream of things to come is fine and dandy, but without action it's all just vapor.
If God has taught me anything this past year it is, "faith is an action." God did not say to Abraham, "Here is your new nation...you should go there,"...He said, "Get out of your country to the land I WILL show you." (Genesis 12:1) If we want to see God move then we can't stand idly by. If we want to hear God then we have to take our ipods out of our ears. I have absolutely no idea what the future holds. I don't even know what it will look like. But I know God goes before me (Psalm 16:8). I know that I plan things in my heart but He directs my steps (Proverbs 16:9). And I am excited. Sometimes I feel like the world wants me to work out the logistics of every path that I will take, but that's not reality. That is not how life works. Even if I planned out everything...plans change. Heck, I thought I would be living in London working for ChristChurch right now. But God knows better the plans He has for me. And all I can do is trust that and take a step forward.
So that is what I am doing. Tonight, (well technically tomorrow), at 3am Eastern Standard time I will embark on my cross country road trip! Connecticut to Chicago in 15 hours. With hope and in faith I get in the car, crap in tow:-) I'll let you know how it goes...
The idea of moving, the concept of change, the dream of things to come is fine and dandy, but without action it's all just vapor.
If God has taught me anything this past year it is, "faith is an action." God did not say to Abraham, "Here is your new nation...you should go there,"...He said, "Get out of your country to the land I WILL show you." (Genesis 12:1) If we want to see God move then we can't stand idly by. If we want to hear God then we have to take our ipods out of our ears. I have absolutely no idea what the future holds. I don't even know what it will look like. But I know God goes before me (Psalm 16:8). I know that I plan things in my heart but He directs my steps (Proverbs 16:9). And I am excited. Sometimes I feel like the world wants me to work out the logistics of every path that I will take, but that's not reality. That is not how life works. Even if I planned out everything...plans change. Heck, I thought I would be living in London working for ChristChurch right now. But God knows better the plans He has for me. And all I can do is trust that and take a step forward.
So that is what I am doing. Tonight, (well technically tomorrow), at 3am Eastern Standard time I will embark on my cross country road trip! Connecticut to Chicago in 15 hours. With hope and in faith I get in the car, crap in tow:-) I'll let you know how it goes...
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