Hope for the Hopeless

Ask any of my friends, I am a verbal processor.  Probably annoyingly so…but regardless, it is how I decompress and gain perspective. Therefore, for the purpose of dealing with life this post is about seeking hope in the midst of the unknown.  Thanks for the space to process.  You may not have signed up for the job of sounding board, but hey, you are the one reading!  May my ramblings be relevant to your ears and your heart.

Okay, this week I was struck by the sheer number of unknowns in my immediate future.  For example…where will I sleep in a month?  Where will I call home?  Where, if anywhere, will I do ministry?  Job? Finances? Future? All are unknown…the last eight years of my life have been characterized by a series of leaps.  Jump first, trust God, and ask questions later.  After all, God said to Abram “Go and I will show you…”  Obviously there is faith involved in following God and not blind faith in the sense of lemmings following to the unknown…but trusting that He is a good God and we don’t need to know all the details to be obedient and follow where He is leading.  Even when we think we know the details, God could be leading us somewhere completely different and the adventure lies in trusting Him and His sovereignty over the grand scheme of things.  So again, I have little hesitation to leap headfirst into the unknown.  Because I follow the Known God.

Yet…this week…I don’t even know where to jump.  One of my life verses is Proverbs 16:9 “Man makes plans in his heart but God directs his steps.”  Again, our faith is worked out as we follow God. All I can do is follow where I believe He is leading and have the peace and understanding to let dreams go and change as they do and pick up new dreams and venture down paths that are opened to me.  But this week I felt as if all doors were slammed in my face.  Plans, contingency plans, and contingency plans for my contingency plans all fell through.  Job search is still in a holding pattern.  Personal life is, well, hard.  It seems like everything I am dreaming for, hoping for, and planning is out of my control and out of reach.  My heart is burdened with the unknown and I do not even know what direction to face, let alone jump towards…

But again, the truth that keeps resonating with my heart is this: in the unknown I am loved by the Known God.  In Him there is hope for the hopeless and peace for the weary.  All those who are burdened and heavy-laden can come to Him and find rest.  I guess I need rest.  Peace.  Patience.  And hope.  I want to plan out the future, but I can’t.  I want to be in control, but I’m not.  That in and of itself should be reassuring…do I really want to be the one in control?  Perhaps not.  All I am saying is that life is hard, but even as it is hard I will continue to look towards God.  I will continue to seek peace and hope for what’s next.  And I will trust that the Good God has good plans ahead.

Life is hard, but God is faithful.  It is the cry of my heart to ask for more faith and peace for the process.  So Lord, hear my cry.